Monday 12 November 2012

Confessions of a small minded police author


For those of you who don't know I am a serving police constable with an English police force. I set up this blog (and the Facebook page) with the intention of unashamedly generating a bit of interest in a self published book I'd written, but also to use it as a forum for readers to give me feedback, raise issues and offer ideas if I ever decided to write a follow up... and of course every police officer wants a soapbox from which to moan and vent frustrations at various organisations!

The book has been selling reasonably well on Amazon and I am pleased with the reviews it has gained... until last week. One review, entitled 'Small Minded Author', was scathing in its criticism of the book. The one star review suggested my proud work of literature was spoiled by my apparent bitterness and discrimination towards those I perceive of a lower class. The reviewer even implied my prejudice may stretch as far as racism! Such accusations, although commonly sneered at officers by disgruntles members of the public who have just had their liberty taken away, are by far the most cutting as to fight against those who bully and commit injustices should be the primary motivation behind a police career.

I reflected upon the remarks for some days and would admit the critiquing made me question my professionalism and attitude, even contemplating removing the book from publication so as to review it thoroughly. I am a first time author with only a C grade English GCSE to my name. I would not even claim to be an avid reader as only on holidays do I tend to pick up a book. It was on a holiday, as I lay bored next to my sun worshipping girlfriend, that I first had the idea of writing a police book. I had just finished reading 'Diary of an On Call Girl' by PC Ellie Bloggs (highly recommend you check this out if you like police humour) and thought how privileged I am to be working in a profession that intrigues so many. However, apart from a hand full of obscure publications, penned by serving or retired officers, there is little representation available on paper about what police officers really do every day; there are hundreds of very good text books and formal guides, as well as thousands of glamorised fiction novels, but I wanted to offer something light hearted but truly accurate about the activities myself and thousands of colleagues do come rain or shine. I'm sure every amateur author dreams of one day being at the top of the best sellers list, making the world a better place, whilst at the same time earning a comfortable existence - and I am no different; but as a realist the book was never about financial gain or ego - more of a personal challenge.

The Amazon reviewer took particular exception to my use of the word 'scroat' to describe someone of regular interest to the police regarding their criminal activity. Scroat is a commonly used term in my police force as well as many others. I'm sure any colleague of mine could describe one to you and even point one out on the High Street. As I tried to stress in the book, apparently unsuccessfully to at least one, the label 'scroat' is attached to someone based on their favoured behaviour, not their appearance or class. All scroats will tell you their chosen career path is a result of their harsh upbringing, the neighbourhood and peers they were nurtured in. Maybe sometimes it is, but I believe the majority of the time we make our own choices in life. I know many well respected members of the community (maybe even a few police officers) who grew up on the wrong side of the tracks, but worked hard and seized the opportunities presented to them. In police custody many of our most loyal 'customers' are from a working class background and choose to dress like the N-Dubz tribute act rejects I mentioned in the book; they do enjoy heavy drinking, smoking, tattoos, loud music, Aldi and poor dental hygiene, but I also enjoy some of this too! I am not dictating that everyone who fits the above is a criminal. Occasionally prisoners are well dressed and spoken. But in the police we do stereotype, we do sometimes think the worst of people and sometimes we do as a result get things wrong, but that's just good policing; as a cop you have to play the percentages: if I am presented with a Duncan Bannatyne lookalike and a *Dappy impersonator at the scene of a recent robbery, with no other evidence available to me, forgive me but I will be speaking to the guy with the tea cosy on his head and trousers around his arse first! The vast majority of the ‘working classes’ are just that – people who work hard and get on with their lives without the need to assault, insult or upset anyone else as they do it.

I am not a racist or a misogynist, Mr Davidwhy of Amazon.co.uk, and I am truly sorry if my book offended you. I am however prejudice - against those who commit crime; my colleagues and I will harass, pursue and prosecute those type of people every single day because that is what we do.

* I am in no way implying Dappy or his band N-Dubz are villains! Na na nai!


Thank you to all those who have left positive/constructive reviews on Amazon. It really is appreciated and gives me great encouragement to write some more. The ‘I Pay You Wages!’ Amazon page along with ALL the reviews can be found by clicking HERE

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